Lil Wayne Not Dead Not a Human Being

Recently many people were in shock when TMZ reported that Lil’ Wayne was, well dead. Later reports started to come out that he was infact okay. If you ask another three letter organization they will tell you something different.

On March 30th 2013 papers were leaked by unknown members of MIB giving the full report on what happened, pertaining to his death. Lil Wayne has been telling us that he is “Not a Human Being” for quite sometime and no one paid much attention to it. Maybe we should have now with the fact of the matter is that Lil Wayne is a Martian!!

Yes, that is right he is not a Human Being and is not of Earth. Apparently Lil Wayne came to Earth after being exiled from Mars for smoking Northern Lights a popular strain of kind bud in the 90s. He became so obsessed with the strain that he was growing it on Mars. Little did he know at the time, it would kill the opijonik fruit that was native to Mars and was completely wiped out. This happened for a unique bacteria on the cannabis plant. After that Lil Wayne was sent to Earth to live amongst us… again!

On the day in question Lil Wayne had heard some depressing news according to MIB as it reads the Martian Lil Wayne’s mother and mother have passed on. According to the agent that told Wayne he was in a bad place doing both martian and human drugs along with drinking heavy amounts of Double Cross vodka. By the time Wayne had made it to Cedar-Sinai hospital in LA he had over toxified his human suit. This lead to the initial reports that Wayne was dead! He was in fact out of his human suit and seizing do to large amounts of oxygen exposure. He was trying to light a cigar to raise his carbon dioxide levels when the doctors would not allow it in the hospital. The doctors could not have known the harm they were doing to the martian.

MIB arrived at Cedar-Sinai with a carbon dioxide chamber to help the legal alien regain consciousness. Then came the long process of detoxifying his human suit one of the agents said in the leaked report that the suit was almost triple the normal levels of injoytomarjit a martian drug similar to opium here on Earth. Because of the earlier reports of the rappers death many in the MIB consider putting him in Lunar max prison for the next hundred years. It would be his second stint in the prison as the rapper Lil Wayne was placed there until he was picked up by Martian authorities in the 1973 when he was causing trouble in his human suit known as Jimi Hendrix. He spent almost 3 years in the Lunar Prison that is generally reserved for Alien that have tried to cause irreparable damage on Earth and humans that have attempted time travel and opening wormholes have also been subjected to the Lunar Max discipline.

Lil Wayne was instead notified that he would be released and the reports of his death would be subject to scrutiny. He is now on MIB probation and must report to headquarters in NYC at MTV studios every 3 weeks for the next 5 years. Ms. Minaj was quoted ” It really is a shame the alienation he feels when dealing with MIB.” Birdman has said that Wayne will cooperate rather than returning to Lunar max. The report also mention conversation between MIB and the martian counterpart MIG that there would be no returning to Mars for the funerals Lil Wayne still noticeable shaken up by the fact of his Mother’s deaths was unavailable for comment. It is nice to finally no the truth of what happened in Cedar-Sinai hospital on the night in question. We all now know why he gets a lil weezzy at times, here is his latest video enjoy.

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